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Prince Harry's childhood priest tells him to 'stop being a victim' and calls out his claims to have 'forgiven' his family

A priest who spoke from the pulpit to Prince Harry at Eton has urged him to shed the 'role of victimhood' in a sermon she has writte...



A priest who spoke from the pulpit to Prince Harry at Eton has urged him to shed the 'role of victimhood' in a sermon she has written to help him overcome his 'grief and confusion', MailOnline can reveal.

Angela Tilby, who attended the funeral of his mother Princess Diana and preached to her son in 2002, has warned the Duke of Sussex, 40, that his own actions have 'worsened his alienation from his family'.

She has also questioned his own claims that he has forgiven King Charles and his family over Megxit, saying it is 'clearly a qualified forgiveness'.

'I grieve for that ginger-topped teenager I once preached to', she said, adding: 'I believe that he is a decent man. But, so far, he has found no way to switch off the trauma in his head'.

Canon Tilby has written a piece for the Church Times entitled: 'A sermon that Prince Harry should heed'.

She has urged him to follow Christ's teachings to 'forgive from your heart', saying it can help him find 'liberation'.

The Church of England priest, who did Radio 4's Thought for the Day last month, claims that Harry's decision to blame an 'establishment stitch-up' for his Court of Appeal defeat in a BBC interview, 'sounds as though it comes from the 12-year-old who was required to walk behind his mother’s coffin'.

Canon Tilby wrote: 'He has said too much for relationships to heal. He claims to have forgiven his father and the Royal Family; but it is clearly a qualified forgiveness.

'What he might have picked up from attending morning service in Eton chapel was that forgiveness involves not only making peace with the offender, but, eventually and at great cost, giving up the role of victimhood. The latter is far harder, far more demanding, and, in the end, far more important.

Prince Harry has been urged to forgive from his heart by a priest who preached to him at Eton after his mother's death
Prince Harry has been urged to forgive from his heart by a priest who preached to him at Eton after his mother's death
Angela Tilby, who attended the funeral of his mother Princess Diana, has written: 'I grieve for that ginger-topped teenager I once preached to'
Angela Tilby, who attended the funeral of his mother Princess Diana, has written: 'I grieve for that ginger-topped teenager I once preached to'
Angela Tilby, who attended the funeral of his mother Princess Diana, has written: 'I grieve for that ginger-topped teenager I once preached to'
Angela Tilby, who attended the funeral of his mother Princess Diana, has written: 'I grieve for that ginger-topped teenager I once preached to'

'The logic of the Christian faith suggests that it is only when victims forgive “from the heart” that they that they themselves can find liberation'. 

Angela Tilby, who is Canon Emeritus of Christ Church Cathedral, Oxford and Honorary Chaplain at Portsmouth Cathedral, said she was invited to preach at Eton College in 2002.

She wrote: 'I recognised the ginger top of Prince Harry, who appeared to be immersed in amused conversation with his neighbour, which made me smile. 

'Five years earlier, I had been present at the funeral of Diana, Princess of Wales, and heard Earl Spencer berate the Royal Family for its treatment of Diana and promise to protect her two sons.

'Harry, with William, will have heard all that. He would also have heard the wave of applause from the crowds outside surge through the Abbey congregation. He may have felt, as many of us did on that day, as though a revolution was imminent.

'Yet the moment passed. Years intervened. Harry had his teenage follies and his first love affairs.

'A few years after I spotted him in Eton chapel, he travelled to Lesotho, the beginning of his passion for Africa. In 2006, he set up his charity Sentebale. In 2014, he started the Invictus Games'.

Canon Angela Tilby says she believes that some of the criticism he and Meghan have received has been 'cruel and vulgar'.

She also said it is sad that he feels he 'will never feel safe enough to bring his family to Britain, even though it is his homeland'.

But there are signs that he is struggling to shake the grief and victimhood he felt as a child, she suggested. 

'His book, Spare, worsened his alienation from his family. He has seen his African charity fall apart amid acrimony. His BBC interview last week, in which he said that his security concerns had been dismissed by “a good old Establishment stitch-up”, reveal his ongoing grief and confusion', she wrote.

'The repeated demand for police protection, and the insistence that his father could simply sort this out by ordering it, sounds as though it comes from the 12-year-old who was required to walk behind his mother’s coffin'.

Speaking to the BBC after he lost a court appeal over his security arrangements on May 2, the Duke of Sussex launched a blistering attack on the King.

He complained that his father 'won't speak to him' and that he doesn't know 'how much longer he has left'. 

Prince Harry also revealed he will not bring his wife or children back to the UK - and said he had had 'so many disagreements' with his family, some of whom 'may never forgive' him for writing a book. 

The comments on 

King Charles's health are thought in particular to have raised eyebrows behind palace doors - given his treatment for cancer remains ongoing. 

Former BBC royal correspondent Jennie Bond said: 'I suspect that Harry said more than he had perhaps intended because he was consumed with anger that the court decision had gone against him. 

'When the court ruling didn't go his way, he was, in his own words 'gutted and devastated'. 

'And he was clearly seething with fury. And that is rarely the best time to air your thoughts.'

In the astonishing interview, Prince Harry revealed he did not know how long his father Charles had left to live (pictured together in 2022)
In the astonishing interview, Prince Harry revealed he did not know how long his father Charles had left to live (pictured together in 2022)
Meghan Markle and Prince Harry were spotted enjoying the fifth night of Beyoncé’s Cowboy Carter Tour in California over the weekend
Meghan Markle and Prince Harry were spotted enjoying the fifth night of Beyoncé’s Cowboy Carter Tour in California over the weekend
Meghan Markle and Harry enjoy intimate kiss at Beyoncé concert

She added that she thinks Harry has now lost the support of the 'majority of the British public'. 

The Duke had been pursuing a case through the British courts after his level of security changed when he and Meghan stepped down as working royals

Howeve, Sir Geoffrey Vos, the Master of the Rolls, told Prince Harry his 'grievance' over downgraded security had not 'translated into a legal argument'.

And he ruled the original security decision had been a 'predictable' and even 'sensible' reaction to Megxit – when Harry and Meghan stepped back from being senior royals and left Britain.

The Duke, who claimed to be the victim of an 'establishment stitch-up', has now been put on the hook to pay £1.5million in legal costs after losing the case ten days ago.

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